We’ve all wondered what could bring Sydney’s eastern suburbs to a screeching halt.
Besides Kerri Anne Kennelly and Yumi Stynes reigniting their Australia Day feud outside of Woollahra’s Chargrill Charlies, it has always seemed impossible.
Until today, that is.
Paddington, a suburb with a median house price of $3 million, was overrun by young women clogging up the iconic Oxford St footpath, all lining up for a significant event.
The locals, which primarily consist of P.E. Nation activewear-clad walkers, men in beige chinos, and women weighed down by their Dinosaur Design statement necklaces, were forced to navigate the footpath brimming young women prepared to wait up to two hours to get inside the exclusive event.
Even Brooke Boney was seen swanning past the line, looking chic in a classic celebrity-in-disguise baseball cap.
So what was all the fuss about?
No, it wasn’t Julia Gillard doing a remixed version of her misogyny speech with Albo mixing the sound in the background.
It was something far more culturally relevant; the annual Bec + Bridge warehouse sale.
A utopia where you can snag one of the Aussie brand’s usually $300 gowns for the bargain price of $60.
Women had flocked to sale on a working Thursday, because how could they not?
If you have yet to hear of Bec + Bridge, the brand is the unofficial uniform of Sydney’s eastern suburbs.
They sell the outfits often seen on Hailey Bieber, or women who take the slicked-back ponytail look very seriously, to the point you worry they are giving themselves a headache.
The brand is all about slinky, strapless dresses, matching sets in muted tones, and a $300 vibe.
Its warehouse sale has only enforced its cultural relevancy.
Women were lining up for over two hours to get inside and grab a bargain.
Who on earth has the time to line up for two hours on a random Thursday?
Well, they’re the people who are quick to yell out “flexible work hours!” when you ask them.
One eager shopper admitted she was “missing” university for the chance to scoop up a bargain.
Was she concerned she might miss out on learning something? Maybe, but she was far more concerned about missing out on a dress for $80, usually costing $400.
A pair of women who looked like they should be sitting down for brunch instead of lining up in the sun admitted they were shopping “slaves” sent on behalf of their young adult daughters who had university classes to attend and, therefore, had sent out their mothers to do their bidding.
Another keen shopper shared she’d taken “annual leave” for the day and had armed herself with cash so she wouldn’t have to muck around with finicky EFTPOS machines.
Two ladies in black activewear informed me they couldn’t be photographed because they’d both chucked a sickie to get to the sale, but did graciously share their savvy tips.
The two-woman team who resembled cat burglars shared that their all-black outfits were so they could effortlessly try on clothes over the top and not bother lining up for change rooms once inside.
In fact, one recommended that a “leotard” was the perfect thing to wear to such an event, and obviously can be reused when Kylie tours next.
Another claimed she’d “strip” to save time lining up for a change room.
“We’ve all got tits. It is what it is!”
Not exactly a phrase you’d imagine said on the same streets that Ita Buttrose likely walks along as a neighbouring resident.
One girl explained she was trying to be good because she was “unemployed”, but she’d brought her Mum along, who she claimed could be “convinced” to splurge.
An anxious looking woman said she was getting “stressed” because she’d only parked in two-hour parking but said she wouldn’t risk losing her spot in the line to check on her car.
Would a fine cancel out any possible savings? Maybe, but you can’t dwell on these things during a warehouse sale.
So how much were these women preparing to spend?
The answers varied by the main vibe: whatever it took to feel lining up was worth it.
“There is no limit,” one woman claimed.
“If it’s cute probably a lot,” another said with a shrug.
The bigger question is, when will Paddington regain back control of one of its most popular streets?
Not until Sunday.
It is going to be a very long weekend for the ritzy suburb.